There's no place like home.

I don't feel like I belong here. It's home, and always has been but here does not soothe my soul. It does not inspire or nurture. Here does not satisfy in that deep-soul way we all crave.

So why then am I here? I could say I am attached, tied down, which is true in some ways. We have family here... those are pretty tough strings to sever. We are familiar with life here. With the terrain, with the weather, with the daily grind and routine. But this is not where I imagine my life, my future. This is not how I picture raising a family.

Perhaps I am a dreamer. Perhaps home is where your heart is. Perhaps I should bloom where planted.

Or perhaps I should find the little spot on the earth where I feel the most like myself, and find a way to make it my home. I have been totally challenged by some inspiring individuals who have done exactly that. They have picked up their life and transported to that certain place that makes them sigh with relief and nestle into the day. And in a few years I have realized that I will be much more free to do the same.

Knowing Gavan feels much the same as I do has got me thinking about where that perfect little spot is for us? Or if it even exists?

Here is what I know for sure:

I like 4 seasons
winter needs to be much shorter
I dream of a milder climate supporting lush vegetation, flower and vegetable gardens
I want to grow tomatoes and roses and hydrangea in the backyard
large body of water nearby ocean or lake, I'm not completely particular and both have their charms
sand tracked through the house is how I imagine raising my children
I'd love a cottage or coastal inspired home doesn't look out of place or gimmicky because we're in the middle of the prairies.
I adore smaller communities, but don't want to feel isolated
I long for a sense of history beyond pioneers, first nations and wagon wheels
I would give up the mega-malls for flea markets and antique stores galore
I enjoy architecturally interesting or diverse towns and cities
I require safety for my children, and well me too
I like to live in full color
Good food is important to me and
Food is important to me
I want to be healthier and would like a lifestyle that promotes better choices, like walking.
I'd rather be outside.
I'm afraid of extreme weather like tornadoes
I enjoy tropical climates, but don't need palm trees to be happy.
Tall cedars however can change my mood instantly.
Balmy really works for me
I like fresh and simple more than dark and complex.
(Well unless we're talking about men.)

So where is this magical place? West coast? East coast? Somewhere in the US, where I really don't want to live? (I am a little bit of a patriot.) Does this speak of Europe? South of France?

One day, I hope I find it. And when I do, I hope I have the guts to move towards the light.